CLEAN JOKES
MAIN MENU
Home - Categories
Tell A Friend
Suggest A Joke
Link To Us
Bible Resources
• Bible Study Aids
• Bible Devotionals
• Audio Sermons
Community
• ChristiansUnite Blogs
• Christian Forums
• Facebook Apps
Web Search
• Christian Family Sites
• Top Christian Sites
• Christian RSS Feeds
Family Life
• Christian Finance
• ChristiansUnite KIDS
Shop
• Christian Magazines
• Christian Book Store
Read
• Christian News
• Christian Columns
• Christian Song Lyrics
• Christian Mailing Lists
Connect
• Christian Singles
• Christian Classifieds
Graphics
• Free Christian Clipart
• Christian Wallpaper
Fun Stuff
• Clean Christian Jokes
• Bible Trivia Quiz
• Online Video Games
• Bible Crosswords
Webmasters
• Christian Guestbooks
• Banner Exchange
• Dynamic Content
View Joke!
Internet Jokes
 You're here » Jokes » Internet Jokes » Email Affirmations

Category: Clean Internet Jokes
       Clean Christian jokes, funny jokes, free jokes, and clean jokes and humor about the internet, email, Newsgroups, online, geeks, computers, and windows

 Email Affirmations 

      The Email Forwarder's 12 Step Program
      
      1. I will NOT get bad luck, lose my friends, or lose my mailing lists if I DON'T forward an email!
      
      2. I will NOT hear any music or see a taco dog, if I do forward an e-mail.
      
      3. Bill Gates is NOT going to send me money, Victoria Secret doesn't know anything about a gift certificate they're supposed to send me.
      
      4. Ford will NOT give me a 50% discount even if I forward my e-mail to more than 50 people!
      
      5. I will NEVER receive gift certificates, coupons, or freebies from Coca Cola, Cracker Barrel, Old Navy, or anyone else if I send an e-mail to 10 people.
      
      6. I will NEVER see a pop-up window if I forward an e-mail ...NEVER-- EVER!!
      
      7. There is NO SUCH THING as an e-mail tracking program, and I am not STUPID enough to think that someone will send me $100 for forwarding an e-mail to 10 or more people!
      
      8. There is NO kid with cancer through the Make-a-Wish program in England collecting anything! He did when he was 7 years old. He is now cancer free and 35 years old and DOESN'T WANT ANY MORE POST CARDS, or GET- WELL CARDS.
      
      9. The government does not have a bill in Congress called 901B (or whatever they named it this week) that, if passed, will enable them to charge us 5 cents for every e-mail we send.
      
      10. There will be NO cool dancing, singing, waving, colorful flowers, Characters, or program that I will receive immediately after I forward an e-mail. NONE, ZIP, ZERO, NADA!!
      
      11. The American Red Cross will NOT donate 50 cents to certain individual dying of some never-heard-of disease for every e-mail address I send this to. The American Red Cross RECEIVES donations.
      
      12. And finally, I WILL NOT let others guilt me into sending things by telling me I am not their friend or that I don't believe in Santa.

Previous Internet Joke | Internet Index | Next Internet Joke

Choose another category

Like This Page?


Email this joke to a friend

Search the Jokes

Enter word or phrase







More From ChristiansUnite...    About Us | Privacy Policy | | ChristiansUnite.com Site Map | Statement of Beliefs



Copyright © 1999-2016 ChristiansUnite.com. All rights reserved.
Please send your questions, comments, or bug reports to the